Thursday, April 30, 2009

Superstar Klein Quits Lacrosse

-By: Will Wygal-

After his superstar performance on the football team this past fall senior Greg Klein (pictured below) is once again trying his hand at lacrosse. After not playing his junior year he signed on for his senior year. Shortly after, he quit. When talking to this accomplished athlete, he claimed these were the reasons for quitting. "I quit lacrosse because seeing Tyler Foley more than I have to every day makes me angry. Just listening to him whine on the field disgusts me, but the coaches know if they say something to him he’ll cry and ruin practice," Klein said. Now the former laxer is moving onto to a new sport: girls’ softball. "I decided to spend some time with Coach Nick DeMaio in the training room and take on an apprenticeship with him instead, which includes helping out with the softball team. I do everything from taping up kids to mowing the softball field on Coach DeMaio’s personal riding mower." And then there are those non-athletic activities Greg is lending a hand. "I have taken up a great effort in getting rid of the gremlin problem in the school. I have done this by hanging signs and trying to warn people of the problem as well as patrolling the drafting room in order to make sure they don’t gather there to hold meetings," Klein said. There you have it; from football, to lacrosse, to school vigilante, Greg Klein is a loose cannon of justice and safety.

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